“The greatest discovery of all time is that a person can change his future by merely changing his attitude.”
– Oprah Winfrey
How do the words above resonate with you?
Pause here and free yourself from distractions:
Take a deep breath in... exhale slowly... deep breath in... exhale slowly... deep breath in... exhale slowly... calm your mind and be present...
What is your attitude all about? Think about that for a moment...
"Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference" was the quote posted in my classroom my entire teaching career, at every grade level elementary through high school and stays my thoughts today. Reading Iyanla Vanzant's Acts of Faith brought me back to the lessons I planted some time ago in many students. Vanzant states:
Whatever situation you find your, your behind in today, your mind put you there.
At all times, in all situations, if you don't like where you find your bottom, change what's going on at the top.
Your mind is a powerful thing. The beauty of that is that if you don’t like where you’ve landed, your mind can take you someplace else.
The Four Keys to Overcoming Negative Thinking For Good:
(mrsmindfulness.com by Melli Obrien)
Recommended four-step plan to begin the path to change.
Key One | Recognize Negative Thoughts and Let Them Go (MINDFULNESS):
So, we don’t need to know how to stop negative thoughts. The problem is not that we have negative thoughts. The problem comes when we get hooked by our thoughts and believe our thoughts are true.
‘Name it to tame it’ is a very powerful, simple, tried and tested technique. When an unhelpful thought pattern arises, (or an associated negative emotion) we simply mentally ‘label’ the thought pattern and then we let it go.
Say to yourself : "ahhh negative thoughts arising” or you can even shorten it by just saying “thinking.” It’s almost like saying to the thought “I see you! I see what you’re up to!”
After we mentally note, we let it go. By ‘let it go’ I mean to stop giving it your full attention. Instead, shift your mind back to what is happening in the present moment and give that your focus. Tune into your sense perceptions, what you can feel, see, or smell.
Begin to meditate for at least 15 minutes or more each day. Stick with it for at least 30 days to feel the effect.
One simple yet very powerful way to bring mindfulness into your daily life is through using the three breath pause technique:
All it takes is to pause and center yourself with three, deep, slow mindful breaths. Even if you’re right in the middle of the ‘ring’ of stress and reactivity.
As you take the three breaths, let your full attention rest on the feeling of the breath coming in and out of your body. Pay close attention to every sensation, and let any other thoughts fall away for these moments.
Key Two | Practice Self-Compassion:
Make a pact to be a bit kinder to yourself. Start by practicing self-talk that sounds warm, friendly and kind. Let your inner voice take on the tone of a supportive friend or coach.
If you catch yourself sounding unfriendly, see if you can take a pause and change the tone. Say kind and encouraging things to yourself like, “Good on you for giving that a go honey,” or, “That was a very kind/honest/good thing you did mate,” or, “Hey, it’s okay, you did your best.”
*If you don’t find terms of endearment like ‘honey’ or ‘mate’ useful then of course just drop them and find your own way with this.
When you’re having a hard time, try talking to yourself the way you would speak to a loved one who is hurting. Say soothing words to yourself. Like, “It’s ok, everyone makes mistakes sometimes. You’re human,” or, “Take it easy darling,” or, “Oh this is a tricky moment. May I be kind to myself in this tough time.”
Key Three | Take In the Good:
Set an alarm 2 times per day to stop and take in something good around you.
Deliberately seek out and pay attention to good experiences each day.
Once you have opened up to noticing the good, stay with it and savor it.
Lastly, bring your intention to deliberately absorbing the experience.
Over time, these experiences will add up, gradually gearing the mind to be naturally more happy, grateful and mentally strong.
Key Four | Take Your Focus Back:
Print out the helpful questions and empowering focus questions and put them somewhere prominent or make them your phone home screen or computer home screen until you can remember them easily.
• What is the truth? My deepest truth?
• What do I really want to feel or create in this situation? How can I move towards that?
• How can I make the best of this situation?
• Who would I be without this thought?
• What new story or thought can I focus on now?
• How can I see this in a different or new way?
• What can I be grateful for in this present moment?
It can take courage and humility to question our thoughts and let go of certain stories in the mind, but our willingness to do so will be equal to our feelings of happiness, inner strength and peace of mind.
Today's Challenge: From Iyanla Vanzant's Acts of Faith...
When and how have your positive thoughts unleashed positive changes in your life? Sit with this question, take a deep dive, pend time here...
How can you water more positive seeds today? Be creative...
“Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results.”
– Willie Nelson
What are you willing to do?
Don’t miss your opportunity. Be intentional. Encourage others to do the same and watch what happens.
You got this!
Coach Tavia
#trustyourself, #learnandgrow, #bepositive, #selfawareness, #respectyourselfandothers, #responsibility, #believe, #maximizeyourpotential, #honoryourself, #shareyourgifts, #seizeopportunity, #live, #becreative, #thinkforyourself, #reflect, #reach, #stretch, #bepresent, #accountability, #faith, #confidence, #ittakescourage, #dothework, #beofservice, #knowyourworth, #leadbyexample, #justdoit, #lifecoach, #leadershipcoach, #leadershipdevelopment, #letsgo
References:
The Four Keys to Overcoming Negative Thinking For Good
Vanzant, Iyanla; Acts of Faith: Daily Meditations for People of Color. Atria, New York, NY 2020.
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