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Thursday's Thoughts

Coach Tavia

“Truth is defined as that which cannot be argued about.  When the truth is expressed, there is room for the problem to transform in a healing direction”

                    -Gay Hendricks

How do the words above resonate with you?

Pause here for a moment and free yourself from distractions:

...Take a deep breath in...  exhale slowly...  deep breath in...  exhale slowly...  deep breath in...  exhale slowly...  calm your mind and be present...

Do you believe in justice and equality? That’s a YES or NO question... however, think about it carefully...

...Do you believe in justice and equality all the time, for ALL people..? ...for ALL newborn babies...

...for ALL single mothers

...for ALL kids in the street

...for people you like and people you don’t ...for people who don’t say please or thank you...

If there is anything I could say or do that would convince someone that I, or people like me, don’t deserve justice or equality, then they never believed in justice and equality in the first place.**

Do you believe in justice and equality?

I believe If your answer is yes, and you are willing to stand in your truth, there’s renewed hope, 'there is room for the problem' of inequality and social justice 'to transform in a healing direction.'

“If you believe in justice and equality, we are in this together, whether you like me or not.” -Ijeoma Oluo

Change is never easy.  Expect discussions about race to be to be uncomfortable. Try to avoid tone policing:


Tone policing is when someone in a conversation or situation about oppression shifts the focus of the conversation from the oppression being discussed to the way it is being discussed. It prioritizes the comfort of the privileged person over the oppression of the disadvantaged person.

**If you have been tone policing, you've been doing something harmful whether you mean to or not.


**If you are a white person, in this fight to end racial oppression and want to avoid tone policing behavior and stay focused on being a true ally, in the battle against racism, Ijeoma Oluo offers these suggestions:

  • Be aware of the limits of your empathy. Your privilege will keep you from fully understanding the pain caused to people of color by systemic racism. That doesn't make it any less real.

  • Don't distract or deflect. The core issue in discussions of racism and systematic oppression will always be racism and systematic oppression.

  • Remember your goal. To end systematic racism and systemic oppression.

  • Drop the prerequisites. You are fighting systematic racism because it is your moral obligation as long as systematic racism exists.

  • Walk away if you must, but don't give up. If you don't like an oppressed person or group's language or methods, step aside or find where you can be of help elsewhere.

  • Build a tolerance for discomfort. You must get used to being uncomfortable and get used to this not being about your feelings, if you plan to help not hinder.

  • You are not doing any favors, you are doing what is right. Your efforts to dismantle White Supremacy are expected of decent people who believe in justice. You are not owed gratitude for your efforts.

**If you are a person of color being shamed or criticized by privileged people for your tone, remember this:

  • You have a right to your anger, sadness and fear. These are natural reactions to the unnatural system of racial oppression

  • You were born deserving equality and justice. Your humanity does not have to be earned.

  • You matter. You are no less important to those who try to put preconditions on your humanity.

  • Nobody has authority over your fight for racial justice. You do not need to validate someone else's feelings, to legitimize your desire for racial justice.

  • You deserve to be able to speak your truth and you deserve to be heard.


It helps when all stake holders understand we are more alike then we are different.  The fact is, we are all human.  We are all connected by our fears, our strengths, and our questions. We are all connected by our humanity.  At the end of the day, how we lived well be all that we can take with us.

How have you lived?

...How are you living... when we know better we are obligated to do better...

In that final moment, when you look back on your life, what do you want to take with you? ...think about that for a moment... spend some time here...

What knowledge and experience do you want to take with you?


How do you want to be remembered?

...what legacy do you want to leave behind...?

Don’t miss your opportunity.  Be intentional, encourage others to do the same and watch what happens.

You got this!

Coach Tavia

References: *A Year of Living Consciously: 365 Daily Inspirations for Creating a Life of Passion and Purpose, by Gay Hendricks

**So You Want To Talk About Race, by Ijeoma Oluo

 
 
 

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